Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Randomize
