You made me cry and you don't even care
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
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