Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
operation have a gay friend backfired
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Randomize
