i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Randomize