I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize