just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
