So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
