i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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