I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
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