I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
