So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
We are all done wearing pants today
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
