Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
i think my cat just said my name.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
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