he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
is it fun? or sober?
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
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