Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Is it penis luge time yet?
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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