I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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