i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
