super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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