Texts From Last Night

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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.

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  (215): Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless. http://tfl.nu/tw3i
  Replies (141) Good night (2309) Bad night (2040) Order T-Shirt
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.

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  (617): M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad. http://tfl.nu/r9d8
  Replies (4) Good night (2853) Bad night (469) Order T-Shirt
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  (828): View more from North Carolina

  if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.

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  (828): if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now. http://tfl.nu/f98q
  Replies (14) Good night (1987) Bad night (1177) Order T-Shirt
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  (985): View more from Louisiana

  BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.

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  (985): BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART (601): Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know. http://tfl.nu/j9ff
  Replies (49) Good night (5335) Bad night (639)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat

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  (615): i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat http://tfl.nu/x2jk
  Replies (30) Good night (5807) Bad night (1116) Order T-Shirt
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.

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  (609): I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off. http://tfl.nu/iqir
  Replies (18) Good night (7155) Bad night (974) Order T-Shirt
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  (469): View more from Texas

  She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke

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  (469): She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke http://tfl.nu/g6cx
  Replies (15) Good night (805) Bad night (4463) Order T-Shirt
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.

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  (816): Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster. http://tfl.nu/ox02
  Replies (26) Good night (5837) Bad night (964) Order T-Shirt
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  (479): View more from Arkansas

  You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.

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  (479): You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it. http://tfl.nu/l6w1
  Replies (2) Good night (2162) Bad night (681) Order T-Shirt
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  (727): View more from Florida

  You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?

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  (727): You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you? http://tfl.nu/l34c
  Replies (31) Good night (2947) Bad night (527) Order T-Shirt
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  (239): View more from Florida

  allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.

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  (239): allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee. http://tfl.nu/rbdo
  Replies (5) Good night (626) Bad night (1326) Order T-Shirt
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  (425): View more from Washington

  So that wine I told you about is vile...

  (360): View more from Washington

  That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?

  (425): View more from Washington

  Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.

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  (425): So that wine I told you about is vile... (360): That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it? (425): Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something. http://tfl.nu/ggqv
  Replies (4) Good night (1063) Bad night (504)
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  (478): View more from Georgia

  So. How about you can get tequila certified...

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  (478): So. How about you can get tequila certified... http://tfl.nu/1yln
  Replies (1) Good night (591) Bad night (321) Order T-Shirt
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  (931): View more from Tennessee

  Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.

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  (931): Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close. http://tfl.nu/0xt0
  Replies (3) Good night (691) Bad night (516) Order T-Shirt
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.

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  (201): I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever. http://tfl.nu/v0jl
  Replies (1) Good night (559) Bad night (164) Order T-Shirt

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