Plan B is the new Plan A
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
