It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Randomize