Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Randomize
