Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
