Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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