My balls are so social today.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize