the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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