Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.