70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
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