thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize