I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
