Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
This house was built for laser tag.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Randomize
