And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize