Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Text me some of your sweat
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