Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
