chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
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