in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
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