I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize
