Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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