I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
Randomize