pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
