I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I just found a bag of teeth...
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
