You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
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