So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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