i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Randomize