Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
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Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
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I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
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