it's too hot outside to masturbate.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
