carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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