Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
