Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
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