sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize