But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
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